Funny Science News Articles
Red Bull Linked to Birth Defects – Really Does Give Wings
The Food and Drug Administration yesterday put a hold and general recall on Red Bull energy drink amid evidence that Red Bull has been linked to several birth defects – principally resulting in the emergence of wing-like growths on the backs of…
Octopus Learns to Write, Begs for Freedom
Monterey, CA — Octavio is not your average octopus. This eight-limbed cephalopod has proven the veracity of the idiom “smart as an octopus” once again. The creature, an inhabitant of the Monterey Pier Ocean Center, has taught himself how to read and…
Dude Hella Kite Snowboards Into New Dimension
Santiago, Chile – A throng of snowboarders train their polarized, orange goggles on the sky. A tiny figure slowly materializes out of the dark cloud bank, drifting underneath a giant kite. As he descends closer, his black and white pop-art snowsuit creating…
Rabbits Converge on Manhattan, Eat Carrots, Leave
New York City, NY – 5th and Broadway, the usually bustling thoroughfare of Manhattan, is silent to today. Sounds of taxi’s honking, people talking, music playing – the area’s typical soundtrack – is today muffled by the soft fur of hundreds of…
Fruit All the Sweeter for Being Sung To
Burbank, CA — What kind of music do you like? It’s an innocent enough question. Now, have you ever tried asking a tomato? No, of course you haven’t. Guess again, succotash. Tomatoes love jazz. And nectarines enjoy blues.…
“Lawyer Gene” Discovered, Deposed and Made to Produce Documents
Tucson, AZ – The University of Arizona made a startling discovery earlier this morning, prompting a press conference to announce that they had discovered and isolated the “Lawyer Gene.” Lab students working long hours over the holiday weekend were not even looking…
Radiation Studies: Night Vision Relatively New in Cats
Washington, D.C. – A study released Monday has reported some shocking findings regarding your feline friend. Cats, common knowledge tells us, have the ability to see in almost total darkness. Their eyes are adapted in a way that gives them night…
Nascar Scanner Makes Alien Contact
Bristol, TN – Here at Bristol, the legendary track at the core of Nascar’s eight-cylinder, 800 horsepower heart, things have gone from strange to stranger. Welcome to the gearhead’s world, a world of million-dollar crashes and dirty air. It’s silly season and…
Iceland to Construct Giant Bubble
Reykjavik, Iceland – Ever since gaining independence from Denmark in 1944, Iceland has arguably grown to become one of the premier symbols of forward-thinking, progressive democracy. According to the Human Development Index, it is the most developed country in the world.…
Read the Full StorySpring Flowers Take Up Arms, Call for Global Cooling
McCook, NE – A year ago this place was quiet, safe, almost predictable. Today, nestled here in the foothills of the Nebraskan mountains, the sleepy working-class town of McCook has lost its undisturbed sense peace and blissfully ignorant well-being. The small, geographically…
Carson City, NV – Every Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday for the past seven years, I do the exact same thing. I wake up at 8:45am, shower, get dressed and hit the freeway. I work at a corporate office in the…